There are places I’ll remember all my life

I admit it. I have been in sort of denial about how sad leaving Chile is going to be for me. I am doing this on purpose, for my own emotional well-being. I really really hate saying goodbye. When I was a student here, I spent pretty much the last two months of my seven month stay thinking about leaving and crying a lot. This time, I’ve really been trying to enjoy my time here and not think about leaving. But last night as I watched the season finale of Glee, where everyone was saying goodbye, it really hit me. And when this song was played, a song that was played at my high school graduation, and that my host brother sang at my despedida when I was a student, I couldn’t hold it together. Leaving is going to be hard.

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6 thoughts on “There are places I’ll remember all my life

  1. In my experience as a country wanderer, there are two ways of saying goodbye, the “I really mean it” way and the “I’ll be back” way.
    The “I really mean it” way it is very hard because it means that you need to accept that you are cutting your ties with the previous country and making a conscious decision about not coming back, unless it is for a short visit.
    The “I’ll be back” way it is simpler because it means that it is not really a goodbye, only a “see you later”.
    As an emotional load, the second one is easier to begin and hard to carry on. It is easier to say “see you later” and think that you’ll be back than accepting that you will not be back. However you will need to keep in touch with people and not become a stranger. It might be nice or heavy depending on your personality and your plans.
    The first method is much more brutal but it is easier in the long run.
    I am not very good giving advice so I can only tell you my experiences. I tried to do the “easy” way and only say “see you later” once, and that was a disaster. So from that day on, whenever I had moved from one place to another or from one country to another I just say “goodbye” and I haven’t looked back (not even at the airport, right before passport control).

    • I guess I can’t think of why you would want to “cut ties” with any place. Isn’t there always a chance you’ll be back? In my case, I know I’ll be back to Chile, there isn’t any question in my mind. I might not live here again, but I’ll definitely be back to visit. And keeping in touch is not that hard. Yes, people fall out of touch, but in my opinion, it doesn’t take that long to drop an email or a FB message.

      I guess it’s different if you’re just traveling around and don’t form ties in places you’ve been, but I’ve been here for a total of more than FOUR YEARS. Chile is my second home, and I’ll always be back.

  2. In my experience as a country wanderer, there are two ways of saying goodbye, the “I really mean it” way and the “I’ll be back” way.
    The “I really mean it” way it is very hard because it means that you need to accept that you are cutting your ties with the previous country and making a conscious decision about not coming back, unless it is for a short visit.
    The “I’ll be back” way it is simpler because it means that it is not really a goodbye, only a “see you later”.
    As an emotional load, the second one is easier to begin and hard to carry on. It is easier to say “see you later” and think that you’ll be back than accepting that you will not be back. However you will need to keep in touch with people and not become a stranger. It might be nice or heavy depending on your personality and your plans.
    The first method is much more brutal but it is easier in the long run.
    I am not very good giving advice so I can only tell you my experiences. I tried to do the “easy” way and only say “see you later” once, and that was a disaster. So from that day on, whenever I had moved from one place to another or from one country to another I just say “goodbye” and I haven’t looked back (not even at the airport, right before passport control).

    • I guess I can’t think of why you would want to “cut ties” with any place. Isn’t there always a chance you’ll be back? In my case, I know I’ll be back to Chile, there isn’t any question in my mind. I might not live here again, but I’ll definitely be back to visit. And keeping in touch is not that hard. Yes, people fall out of touch, but in my opinion, it doesn’t take that long to drop an email or a FB message.

      I guess it’s different if you’re just traveling around and don’t form ties in places you’ve been, but I’ve been here for a total of more than FOUR YEARS. Chile is my second home, and I’ll always be back.

  3. I think we are talking about two different things or maybe I didn’t explain myself correctly. By “cutting ties” I mean being honest with people and telling people that you will not come back to live in a place. In my opinion you are doing the right thing and not telling that you will be back, so basically you are cutting your ties with Chile. Obviously you will communicate with friends and such, but you haven’t committed to come back.
    I’m saying this because I made that mistake once. The first time I left Chile I promised I would be back. And I had to do a lot to come back (including pissing the hell out of my employer at that time). And when I was back I realized that it was not what I had thought it would be. So I left Chile a second time, and that time was for good.
    When I left the US to come to Norway I did not make the same mistake. I was clear that I was not coming back, and I told my friends in the US that I was moving and I was not thinking about coming back. It was hard at the begining but after a while everybody understood and my friends were very supportive. Now I travel once every other year (or often depending on my job) to the US and visit my friends.
    In summary I think my message was, whenever leaving a country/city/place you should do it for good and not look back. Keep in touch with your friends, and if destiny has a plan for you to come back, take the opportunity. But don’t commit to come back because you might get into a lot of troubles to be able to keep that promise.

  4. I think we are talking about two different things or maybe I didn’t explain myself correctly. By “cutting ties” I mean being honest with people and telling people that you will not come back to live in a place. In my opinion you are doing the right thing and not telling that you will be back, so basically you are cutting your ties with Chile. Obviously you will communicate with friends and such, but you haven’t committed to come back.
    I’m saying this because I made that mistake once. The first time I left Chile I promised I would be back. And I had to do a lot to come back (including pissing the hell out of my employer at that time). And when I was back I realized that it was not what I had thought it would be. So I left Chile a second time, and that time was for good.
    When I left the US to come to Norway I did not make the same mistake. I was clear that I was not coming back, and I told my friends in the US that I was moving and I was not thinking about coming back. It was hard at the begining but after a while everybody understood and my friends were very supportive. Now I travel once every other year (or often depending on my job) to the US and visit my friends.
    In summary I think my message was, whenever leaving a country/city/place you should do it for good and not look back. Keep in touch with your friends, and if destiny has a plan for you to come back, take the opportunity. But don’t commit to come back because you might get into a lot of troubles to be able to keep that promise.

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