I am so much better at expressing myself in writing than I am verbally. I realized this a few years ago, but it’s been pretty obvious throughout my entire life. When I was little, I hated calling people on the phone. I would beg my parents to call my friends to set up play dates, even when I was at an age to be calling myself. I used to have to call and make appointments to get my horse’s feet trimmed and I would put it off just because I hated calling the farrier, even though I knew him quite well.
When e-mail became a wide-spread and accepted way of communicating, I REJOICED. It’s so much easier for me to jot off an email than to call. I don’t understand how it takes people a long time to get back to people via email, because I can literally spend under 30 seconds responding to most things. With friends, I take longer because usually I have a lot to say, but “checking my e-mail” has never been a long and tedious process for me.
Last night my mom told me about more proof that I have always been a written-communicator. Between the ages of 7-10 years old I would leave my parents notes on their pillows for them to find when they went to bed. She said some of them I wrote when I was angry, and others were just to say that I loved them. I wrote one when I wanted to convince them to adopt the baby mice from my 4th grade classroom.
Further proof of my difficulty with verbal communication is when people ask me how I feel. I have such a hard time putting that into words on the spot, whereas if I think it through awhile, I could usually think of ways to express myself, but by then the moment has usually passed. Recently, I have found that really frustrating! Why is it when I have a keyboard or a pen in front of me, the words just tumble right out, but when I’m talking they are stuck in my throat?
This is something I need to work on. But it scares me just a bit because when I move to Chile everything will be in Spanish, más encima.